Month 1 Reflection.

After a month of working out/eating better I am not where I thought I would be (at all) or where I would like to be, but I've learned this process is going to take A LOT longer then 4 short weeks. Looking back at my food journal and workout schedule I can honestly say my downfall is eating. Starting today I am serious about getting on track with Weight Watchers (WW) again and I do not/will not/can not go over my daily points this week! Losing weight is not just about eating right and not just about working out. For this to happen I need to to BOTH things. In the past I've tried just doing WW and have tried just working out without really focusing on my eating. And what happened??? I lost - maybe - a few pounds on each try and then QUICKLY gained them back. This time I want to lose the weight (more then just a few lbs though) and KEEP IT OFF!!!

This is an important milestone for me I think because this past week I have been getting off track with eating healthy. Instead of letting this setback get to me and make me want to give up, this time I really want to step-up and make up for last week with an amazing eating week this week. I can't let a few bad days ruin everything. It is time to forget about last week and just focus on making this week a great week and the best it can be.

Also, last week I REALLY did not feel like working out Thurs and Fri - but I did anyway. I pushed myself even though I was tired and got the workout done. Then I took Sat and Sun off (which now I'm mad at myself about because I SHOULD have worked out at least 1 of those days). I can't beat myself up about it though because 5x/wk working out is still good, but I dunno, I'm still kind of disappointed.

Here is a story Ali shared with Jill and I this morning.

http://www.jillianmichaels.com/lose-weight/success-stories/keri-loses-60-pounds.aspx

I think this was a great thing to come into work and see because it was just the pick-up I needed! There are stories like this all over the internet and hopefully my story will be one day too. Here is a quote from the article:

"The best advice I can give is to try not to get discouraged or let others bring you down. Losing weight is not easy, and it doesn't happen overnight. It took me over a year to lose 60 pounds, but I didn't just diet this time — I made a lifestyle change." 

So, it may take a year (or longer) but I want this weight to come off! I just need to keep reminding myself THIS IS NOT EASY AND NOT GOING TO HAPPEN OVER NIGHT.

This is about a lifestyle change!!! Make time to workout.... make those healthier choices when it comes to food selection... IT WILL BE WORTH IT IN THE END!


EDIT:
I want to add 1 more - not so positive - thing, just about how I have been feeling about myself and my mood lately. I feel like since I've started this journey I am even less confident in myself then I was before. I feel good inside that I'm working on myself but now that I'm more aware of my body and how I look I feel like I've realized just how bad I look. I think before I knew I wasn't great looking but I think I thought I looked better then I really did. Now I feel like I know what I truly look like and it's all I think about. I hate how I look in EVERYTHING I wear (even t-shirts) and I just feel fat all the time. I wish working out and stuff helped me feel better about the way I look but it doesn't -- especially because so far after a month nothing has changed. I know I've been a total grouch recently and in a very very 'down' mood. It's just hard not to be when I am surrounded by people who are smaller than I am who constantly remind me of how I don't look as good as they do. It's just been tough for me recently. I hope I can get out of this bad mood slump soon.